SPAIN MAGAZINE ONLINE

SPAIN MAGAZINE ONLINE Spain Mallorca online Monthly Magazine

   

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Spain Magazine Online

Welcome. Spain magazine Online is a British English Spanish Online Magazine created to supply everything Spanish in English to our online Readers. From weather to the latest News both home and in Spain ..

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Spanish and British News

The latest British and Spanish news brought to you online , we gather the best of the best News Reports Articles which may have direct benefits to you the expats living or working in Spain , English abroad need to be in touch on key issues, Spain magazine online is your link...

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Spain and British Humour

  • Spain magazine monthly is a light read and designed to be both informative and a light read , Our Humour section takes a lighter look at Spanish living and all things worldwide that you just can`t help admitting is worthy of a laugh .

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Spain Magazines Online

Spain magazine online has one philosophy to give our readers Information and an enjoyable read Monthly. Spanish living is great we all know that but sometimes the British English take on things can be a world apart from the Spanish way , we see things from both sides and look at life in Spain from both sides .

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Spain magazine HUMOUR latest PDF Print E-mail

A twin-engine plane has one of its engines fail, altitude and air speed are rapidly decreasing ... The pilot speaks over the intercom.
"I'm sorry it had to come to this folks, but unfortunately we're gonna have to jettison baggage in order for the aircraft to remain airborne."

Baggage is thrown out, but the plane's speed continues to decrease.

Again the pilot gets on the intercom, "I hate to have to do this, but now we're gonna have to start off-loading passengers.
The only fair way to do it is alphabetically, so we'll start with the letter - A". "Africans, any Africans on board?"


No one answers.

"Ok then - B".

"Black people, any black people?"

Again, silence.

"C" Coloured people, any Coloured people on board?"

Silence.

A little black boy in the back turns to his mother.
"But Mom, ain't we African?, ain't we Black?
Ain't we Coloured?"

"Yes son, but for the purpose of this exercise we is Niggers.
Let dem Mexicans and Muslims go first."


 

LETTER Received by Dr Ruth Agony Aunt ..

 

Spain Magazines Online

 Humour from Spain magazine online

 

The Construction Worker Little Girl helper

This is a story about the bond formed between a little girl and a
group of building workers. It's allegedly true and might help to confirm
your belief in the goodness of people and that there is hope for the human
race....................


A young family moved into a house next door to an empty plot. One day, a
gang of building workers turned up to start building on the plot.

The young family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all
the activity going on next door and started talking with the workers.

She hung around and eventually the builders, all with hearts of gold,
more or less adopted the little girl as a sort of project mascot.

They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had tea and lunch
breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel
important.


They even gave the child her very own hard hat and gloves, which thrilled
her immensely.

At the end of the first week, the smiling builders presented her with a
pay envelope - containing two pounds in 10p coins.

The little girl took her 'pay' home to her mother who suggested that they take the money to the
bank the next day to open a savings account.

At the bank, the female cashier was tickled pink listening to the little
girl telling her about her 'work' on the building site and the fact she
had a 'pay packet'.

'You must have worked very hard to earn all this', said the cashier.

The little girl proudly replied, 'Yes, I worked every day with Steve and
Wayne and Mike. We're building a big house.'

'My goodness gracious,' said the cashier, 'And will you be working on the
house again next week?'

The child thought for a moment. Then she said seriously:
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'I think so. Provided those wankers at Jewsons deliver the fucking
bricks.'
 

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